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How Harmony Happens

Many of you may have shared in the celebration of Easter this past weekend. For us, there was even more to celebrate, and I’m not referring to April Fools 🙂

This year our celebration for Sizdah Bedar fell on the same day as Easter. Sizdah Bedar is the 13th day after the Persian New Year. This is when families go outdoors and spend their entire day in the park playing, having fun, and soaking in their families and the fresh air.

We started our morning with an Easter egg hunt, followed by some deviled Easter eggs. My husband then got right to work on making a delicious Persian feast (no cooking on Easter was a great gift to me indeed!). We ate outside, then headed to the park to meet up with other families to play frisbee, volleyball, and walk around.

I have to admit, I was pretty tired after being up late doing Easter prep, so we spent the end of the day in relaxation mode, which is also a true gift to me.

The ease of the day really struck me about how how harmonious life can be when we create an intention, and put in the effort to make it happen. My schedule for the entire week reflected my goal of having two great celebrations with my family, and taking small steps toward that goal each day allowed it to come to be.

This is so true for all of the aspects of our life. If you want something and make an intention, but not a plan, it doesn’t usually fall into your lap. You have to create strategy, and put in some effort to manifest your life’s cravings, but it’s absolutely worth it!

Ready to start satisfying your life’s cravings?

Calendar Strategy Session (free call)

If you ever feel like there’s not enough time, or that you are so busy serving everyone else you don’t have time for you, then I’d like to help. I am offering free calendar strategy sessions to help you remove overwhelm so that you can start satisfying your life’s cravings.
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Spring Cleaning for YOU!

It’s a perfect time to slough off your personal winter with the Spring Cleaning for YOU program! I promise this will  not only give your health and energy a jumpstart, but it will inspire you, and refresh your mindset as well.
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Money Health & Harmony

You work hard for your money, so hard for it, honey. So where is it?

This is for the ladies who often feel like there is a brick wall between them and the flow of money. Come see what others have to say about this program, and how it has given them their Health & Harmony back!
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Hump Day Harmony: The Chair

Hump Day Harmony is about giving inspiration to help you over whatever mountain is standing in the way of your Health & Harmony

 

I have an old chair that belonged to my great grandmother, and I absolutely love it. I also love how it allows me to reflect on the lives of two very different yet similar women when I think about the woman that sat in that chair about a century ago (my great grandmother), and the woman that sits in that chair now (me).

My great grandmother’s life was very different than mine in so many ways. She was so poised and polished beginning her day by dressing with hose on her legs and heels on her feet. Her hair was set perfectly, and her clothes were pressed and lovely. This was a practice she maintained into her 90’s. She was in charge of managing the household, yet many of the family’s needs were delivered directly to the door, such as milk, and meat. This left her with plenty of time to drive my grandmother and great aunt absolutely bonkers. It almost seems that life was not nearly as rushed for her when I compare it to my day to day life. Yet, she was burdened with expectations; expectations that came from society, and from herself. She felt a pressure to be sure that she managed herself and her family in a certain manner, and that was her sole purpose. Her passions were the silly activities of women with no real world value, and her contributions to society were not appreciated.

Fast forward 100 years, as I sit in my great-grandmother’s chair more than likely in a pair of yoga pants or jeans with the freedom to choose my impact on the world, and the satisfaction of knowing that I can invaluably contribute in a positive way. Yet, I also sit with the burden of expectations, though now the expectations seem to have grown. I am expected to work and contribute to this world or I have not done my part to further women; I am expected to be a devoted mother and wife, or I am failing our future and my responsibilities; and I am still expected to manage the household as my great-grandmother did – keep the refrigerator stocked, the plates full, the checkbook balanced, and the bank account abundant.

The one expectation that neither my great-grandmother nor I seem to have is an expectation to dedicate any time or thought to taking care of ourselves, and yet without devotion to ourselves how do we remain whole enough to fulfill all these expectations?

Perhaps you have felt the burden of expectations from time to time, or they are so subconscious that you haven’t even realized they were there. Even if you haven’t noticed them, you most likely have encountered someone willing to offer judgment based on these expectations. Moms that judge the mom on her phone at the playground, customers that judge the woman with the tantrumming child in the grocery store, co-workers that judge the mother that missed a deadline because her child was sick, and so on and so on. These judgments further ingrain the societal expectations into our own subconscious, that when we do exercise free-will, it’s hard to be clear if our choices belong to us or are the result of a burden we feel mandated to meet.

So in protest of the cultural pressure to be perfect, should we send our kids to school smelly, and stop paying the bills. That actually does sound kind of awesome, but may be a bit extreme for most of us. However, instead maybe we can let ourselves off the hook a little bit. Maybe it can be ok if you go get a well deserved massage after work, and your child misses one dance class; maybe it can be ok to schedule a “skip” day from work and school, and have fun with your family; maybe it can be ok that the only way you can take a call or get any work done is by letting your child run on the playground, and let the judgers judge?

Expectations, whether internal or external usually lead to disappointment, so can we agree to be ok with letting go of perfection, and embrace the joy in our lives?

I would love to hear your thoughts. Do you ever feel the pressure of expectations? Have you ever felt the freedom of letting them go?

 

For many of us these expectations are so ingrained in our subconscious. It makes sense when you think about the two women sitting in the chair 100 years apart feeling their burden. That’s why it can take some outside support, and learning how to turn off our thoughts to get to our real life’s cravings. If you are interested in receiving this type of support, The Have It All Method is a 9 week virtual coaching program that offers just that, and a new session begins March 21. To learn more visit www.kalusion.com

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Hump Day Harmony: Keep Your Cup Filled

Hump Day Harmony is about giving inspiration to help you over whatever mountain is standing in the way of your Health & Harmony

 

Today’s Hump Day Harmony is a break from the routine. Instead of a blog, I’ve decided to delight with a video, sort of like a show and tell. Without further ado…

hump-day-harmony-keep-your-cup-filled-snapshot

 

If you need help discovering your authentic goals, or just need permission to chase them, check out The Have It All Method at www.kalusion.com or contact me below.

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Cleaning & Clearing

I am still in the midst of a major spring cleaning of my home and myself. I have already donated about 5 garbage bags filled with things that I really don’t need at this time, passing them on to someone else that can really use them, and opening space in my life for what I need right now

I wasn’t always so good about clearing things out, and still work at it, as I have a tendency to create emotional attachments to things. My most obvious lesson came from a pair of pajama bottoms stowing away in my closet some time ago. They sat at the bottom of my drawer because I really didn’t like them, there was nothing wrong with them, I just didn’t like them. However, I refused to get rid of them, opting to keep them as a “just in case” pair of bottoms. Yet every time I would get to the bottom of the drawer and see those dang things peeking back at me, I’d grimace at them and throw in a load of laundry just to avoid them (which is really saying something). Finally, I said enough is enough, I don’t care if there’s nothing wrong with them, I’m getting rid of them. I’m not really a shopper, so to replace them brings thoughts of digging through racks of clothing, blah, but whatever, I wasn’t wearing them anyway. I kid you not, the next day I was walking through the store because I had to pick up something for my son, and as I walked by the women’s pajama department, an adorable pair of pajama bottoms screamed out at me “pick me” from their spot on the rack. I ran right over to them, grabbed them, and was on my way. There was no miserable shopping and digging for a new pair, and I wear them all the time, I love them and how comfy they are. It was as if, I couldn’t have them until I made room for them. While I know pajama bottoms are not exactly spiritual enlightenment, they were definitely a lesson towards my growth.

What are you holding onto that is blocking you from what you really want?

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5 Ways to Simplify your Home and Life

“Simplify, Simplify, Simplify”
Henry David Thoreau said it, and he meant it, as he took off to live in an isolated cabin in the woods with barely any earthly possessions.
Now, nearly 200 years later, it still holds true. Even in this time of unlimited choices and advanced technology, the simplest answer is usually the best one for us. The simplest foods tend to be the healthiest, the simplest drinks tend to be the purest, the simplest medicines (herbs, nature) tend to be the most healing and least damaging, the simplest toys encourage more creativity, and the simplest lifestyles tend to be the most fulfilling.
One of the places where I like to encourage beginning simplification is the home. I work with so many Mom’s that feel overwhelmed with day to day life, and keeping up with the breakneck pace that their entire family is committed to. Life is busy, but when your home is busy too you can find yourself in constant overwhelm. Tackling your home gives a very visual sense of accomplishment and allows you to drop your shoulders and breathe fully.
When your home is organized and uncluttered, it actually drastically reduces your “to do” list. You don’t have to spend as much time managing your belongings, you can dedicate your time to things that are more important to you such as family time, and you still have everything you need. Accomplishing this actually reduces your “there’s not enough hours in the day” feelings. It creates a less over-stimulating environment for your children, and can actually improve their attention and focus. Not to mention, there is more family harmony when everyone feels at ease in their home sanctuary.
Sounds great and so simple, so what’s the catch?
Personally, I believe that clutter and crap have the same reproductive lifecycle as fleas, lice, and cockroaches. They’re always in abundance no matter how much we don’t want them. Every time I clear out my home, I seem to get an influx of well-meaning friends wanting to “hand down” their children’s toys, or the next holiday arrives and fills things up again. It’s especially challenging if you develop sentimental attachments to things (ahem).
So, how do we go about this? After many years working at this assignment, here are my recommendations.

Simplify Home Photo
1. Tackle one area at a time
You are more likely to be successful if you tackle small projects. It’s less overwhelming, and once completed you will be inspired and motivated to continue the work. I once did a drastic clean out of my clothes closet. After parting with 4 lawn and leaf bags (and this came from a small closet), I felt great. Getting ready every morning was quicker, putting laundry away was quicker, and I just felt at ease every time I approached my closet instead of tense. It gave me a huge push to tackle the next area of my home.

2. Do your toughest project last
If you have one area of your home that you know is really tough for you to clear out, do it last. Completing easier projects will give you a sense of accomplishment, and enjoying what you have done already will give you the momentum to clear out your toughest area. For me, clearing out the kid’s toys is the most difficult. I think I feel bad making those decisions for them, and am actually quite grateful that now my daughter is able to do it for herself. It actually took some training for her to be able to clear her space well after years of her Mom not being so great at it. She also feels amazing once it’s completed, and stops avoiding her room.

3. Don’t relocate your clutter
Moving clutter from a closet to the shed or storage is not clearing it out. If there is no way you are ever going to host that yard sale; then get it out. If there is no way you will ever get around to putting it on Craigslist; then get rid of it. If you want to make some money from your clothing and possessions, look for local consignment shops. Also, there are some really worthwhile donation centers such as women’s shelters in every community that can make you feel good about passing things on.

4. Accept that this isn’t a one-time deal
As I mentioned before, clutter reproduces quickly and silently. You can be living your happy life when all of a sudden you feel it weighing down on you again, eek! The good news is usually you get so used to enjoying your clear space, that it takes much less clutter to jump start you again.

5. Have fun with it
Re-imagine your space with simple, clean, family-friendly design projects to really feel good about all your hard work. And, don’t feel like you have to get rid of everything you love just because it’s not functional. Hold on to your favorite mementos as part of your design, and they will stand out more now that they aren’t hidden behind so much other stuff.
Enjoy your space, your family, and your life!